Big Family, Fun ?
I guess I don't understand what changed in the last 2 decades. (this has nothing to do with the post previous to this:)
Why is everyone so put off with a big family ? I really want to know why everyone seems to have lost sight of the good parts to having more than 1 or 2 kids ?
We have 3 kids. THREE ! It's not like we have 8 kids.....but if you talk to people you would think that we did. I guess the whole thing surprises me.
We have talked about having another one. YES PEOPLE...NEWS FLASH !!! See how defensive I get already. What the hell. It doesn't matter who we talk to....where we go....someone has something to say about having a fourth.
"You have NO idea what you are getting yourselves in to"
"You should wait until the babies are a little older, and then you will realize that you don't want another one"
"My fourth was the problem child. I should have stopped at three"
"Are you fucking CRAZY"
"You won't have time for the three you have"
"It's not fair to the kids....you are spread to thin"
"Do you know how EXPENSIVE kids are"
"one is good. Two is ok. anything beyond that doesn't make sense....you only have two of you...so you should only have two kids"
I don't understand why having 4 children (which in Utah is a MEDIUM sized family) is considered anything less than crazy.
I know how everyone says that they don't have more children because of money.
Money is the answer and arguments end. Right ? There is a certain right to this answer...but not the one I think matters. To live is one thing. To have a roof over your head and food on your table. ok. But to limit your children for luxuries alone seems crazy to me. Selfish even.
I read an article about Chinese kids. The government had limited how many children each family could have.
Which was one of the reasons baby girls were being thrown away if you didn't remember.
They have since said that there were problems showing because of this. The children were BRATS. They said that the children were SPOILED. They were given SO much, because the parents weren't allowed more children, so they spent everything on that one child. They put ALL of their hopes and dreams on to that one child. They gave them all of the luxuries because they could afford it only having one...and it was in a sense ruining their children. The article went on to say how they were growing up with unrealistic expectations and had self destructive behaviors.
Is this REALLY happening. Is it an over generalization. Maybe.
NOW BEFORE ANYONE STARTS GETTING THEIR PANTIES IN A BIND. I am NOT trying to judge someone for not having more children. For choosing to only have one. I am just trying to ask the question. argue the point. WHY is it BAD to want lots of kids ?
Why is a family of four so outrageous, and becoming unheard of ?
People who have kids tell me to stop now ! Tell me how much work it is !
When the hell did work become unheard of. I keep hearing this over and over.
When did everyone get in their heads that things were supposed to be easy and happily ever afteresque. Seriously. Marriage is too hard. Kids are too hard.
To me...these are the things that we SHOULD be working at. These are the things WORTH working for. These are the things that we work the hardest at and give us the best rewards. Not paychecks. Not praise even.
They give us little hand prints on the TV screen.
Harmonicas in the toilet.
Hugs at random times through out the day.
Funny stories about testicles and sticky rectangles.
Slobbery, wet kisses and the sweetest smell.
They have given me the gift of being young again. I go on Carnival rides and swim. I go to birthday parties and eat cake. I run through sprinklers and jump on trampolines. I read Dr. Seuss and watch Disney movies.
My dream is to have my children, their spouses and hopefully my grandchildren wrapped around my dining room for Thanksgiving dinner.
Piled on my living room floor at Christmas time.
Having an Easter egg hunt in my backyard in the spring time.
I think that yes, there will be sacrifices.......but the sacrifices we will be making seem worth it. Seem like the right choice. For US !
I have 3 AMAZING children. Each with his or her own personality, gifts, stories to tell. I Hope and Pray that I can add another person to my family. I have doubts and I have worries. I have no crystal ball. and barely any money. I do have love though. Lots and lots of it.
I have new priorities and a new respect for mothers and fathers every where.
I just wish we could all support each others quests to be the best that we can be.
Whether it be the mother of 1 or 7. Anything over 7 is fucking ridiculous. :)
You have read this article big familes
with the title Where have all the kids gone ????. You can bookmark this page URL https://playing-home.blogspot.com/2007/07/where-have-all-kids-gone.html. Thanks!
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